Falling in Love
Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose
(paperback: Routledge 2nd Ed., 2005)
(hardcover: Routledge 1st Ed., 1999)

How we fall in love remains a timeless mystery. Throughout history, artists, writers, and philosophers have pondered love's secrets. Falling in Love is the first book to unlock the mysteries of how and why we fall in love.

Renowned couples therapist Ayala Pines believes that one of the best places for us to grow as individuals is within an intimate relationship. Better understanding the contours and patterns of how and why we fall in love can help us gain important self-knowledge, find meaningful relationships, or improve existing ones.

Falling in Love shows us that we both consciously and unconsciously select those with whom we fall in love. Citing the most important studies on love and relationships, Pines looks at how such factors as arousal, beauty, and character affect how and who we choose to love. She uses her extensive clinical research with hundreds of couples, explaining what goes on in our unconscious minds when we fall in love and details how forgotten childhood experiences surface later in our adult love lives.

Drawing on the latest studies on falling in love, as well as fascinating clinical anecdotes, Falling in Love is a rich, practical guide that will provide help for those seeking love and those seeking to improve their relationships.

Romantic Jealousy
Causes, Symptoms, Cures
(Routledge, 1998)

Most adults have had some experience with romantic jealousy, whether they've felt jealous themselves or had a jealous partner. Few, however, know how to cope with this type of jealousy and keep it from damaging their relationship. Now Dr. Pines reveals the importance of jealousy and offers practical options for gaining control of it.

Couple Burnout
Causes and Cures
(paperback: Routledge 1st ed., 1996)
(hardcover: Routledge, 1st ed., 1996)

In Couple Burnout, Ayala Malach Pines offers a unique model to combat relationship burnout. Drawing from extensive research and years of clinical work, Pines describes the phenomenon of couple burnout; its causes, danger signs, and symptoms; and the most effective strategies therapists can use with couples. Distinguishing burnout from problems caused by clinical depression or other pathologies, Pines utilizes three major clinical perspectives that are used by couple therapists - psychodynamic, systems, and behavioral - while also focusing on the social-psychological and existential perspectives of couples' problems. Using dozens of case studies for illustrations, Couple Burnout offers detailed instructions for therapists interested in applying this conceptual framework to their work with individuals, couples, and couple groups. Issues of gender differences in burnout, of balancing intimate relationships with careers, and of burnout in sex are addressed in individual chapters.